Paul’s Horrornable Mentions

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Friday the 13th Part 2

We are starting our October Horrornable Mentions off with a slash by looking back at Friday the 13th Part 2.
It was the sequel nobody but Paramount Pictures wanted, Mrs. Voorhees was dead, Jason was in Crystal Lake...what more was left to say??? Plenty, apparently.
This entry is actually my favourite film in the entire Friday 13th franchise, it's geuinely scary, the kills are top notch and I'm just gonna say it....the sack with the hole in it is way better than the hockey mask!
Ginny (Amy Steel) is one of the best Final Girls in horror movie history and this is possibly one of the most believable versions of Jason in the entire series, right down to setting traps for his prey and his makeshift shack in the woods.
Yes there are crazy timeline issues and the entire opening scene supposes Jason can leave Crystal Lake and track down Alice, the lone survivor from the first movie. But we are also treated to a cast that are playing their parts well, director Steve Miner actually avoids the tropes that would become commonplace in the sequels and there is even a fairly clever period joke.
If you only see one Friday the 13th, make it this one.
Who Wins the Movie: Ginny outsmarts Jason using psychology...and a machete.
Best Kill: It's a toss up between the double impalement and wheelchair bound Mark copping an axe to the face and the rolling down the longest staircase at the camp.
#horror #halloween #dvg #friday13th #jasonvoorhees #sequel #finalgirl #film #movies

 
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Ticks

I love creature features! They're stupid, they're gross, the plot is always ridiculous and there is always celebrities either at the start or at the end of their careers. Exhibit A.....Ticks!
We have Seth Green (Robot Chicken, Family Guy), Alfonso Ribeiro (Carlton from Fresh Prince of Bel Air), Peter Scolari (Bosom Buddies) and basically every other actor you saw in a mid to late 90's sitcom, cop or medical show.
Basically a group of troubled teens are sent to the woods to get back in touch with nature. Carlton from Fresh Prince is the tough guy! His name is 'Panic'! I'm not making this up! Also in the woods are hillbillies (Clint Howard!!) farming marijuana with the help of special chemicals. The ticks eat the chemicals, start mutating and then it gets real gross, real quick.
The ticks look amazing even if they move with Looney Tunesesque sound effect. The make up is at its bloody, gooey best, especially for poor Clint Howard who is just acting his brains out in the movie (and every movie he's in!). There's a kind of subplot of a dom/sub pair of hillbillies (one who starts with a British accent the he gradually loses) and an awesomely ridiculous scene when veterinarian examines one of the ticks. They also left it wide open for a sequel.
I watched this back on vhs in the 90s and may have attached an unhealthy amount of nostalgia to it....It's not a great film. But if you like your creature features gooey and gross, and want to watch Seth Green put in a pretty decent performance, check out Ticks.
Who wins the movie: Alfonso Ribeiro is awesome as the tough guy, his opening scene is peak 90s tough guy character acting, and he holds his own throught the flick.
Best kill: Carlton from Fresh Prince claims the best kill too as he not only cops a lot of damage, he also chews the shit out of the scenery during his (first) death scene.

 
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Chopping Mall

So in the 1980's the movie world was pretty into robots. We had been introduced to them via Star Wars, The Terminator, Weird Science, that really weird bit in Rocky 4!
In 1986 we met Johnny 5 in Short Circuit and he was great, don't get me wrong, but I feel he took some thunder from today's Horrorary Mention....Chopping Mall.
Back in the VHS video store days there were a couple of companies that would show other titles on the back sleeve of their videos (especially horror movies). I would always see the iconic picture for Chopping Mall but alas never got to see it. Well, scrolling through a certain streaming service's horror section last night....there it was!
So I got to watch (and my wife had to endure) my first screening of Chopping Mall. It was...interesting.
The movie starts with a huge shopping mall in L.A using robots as security to....I dunno, help catch shoplifters? The robots are similar to the ones in Robocop (you know, the ones with a 'glitch'), only they look way worse and move as if being steered inside by a drunk raccoon.
Three couples decide to have a party in a furniture store which leads not only to some awkward same room canoodling but also pisses the robots off. The couples start splitting up, wandering off and getting killed.
I would recommend watching this just for the reason that it was something different for the slasher genre. Also the acting (or lack thereof) from final girl Alison (Kelli Maroney who's character looks like the 80s personified) and the special effects (!) from the robots need to be seen. Enjoy. Maybe. Probably not.
[ ] Who wins the movie: Phew! Tough one. The robots can't feel shame so they can win this one. Oh character actor icon Dick Miller is in this movie. He gets electrocuted. By a security robot. For no reason.
[ ] Best kill: Suzie, despite being zapped multiple by a robot, definitely 'loses her head' on the last shot....Oh hey I can write 80's slasher movie dialogue too. Also not a kill but there's a completely unecessary scene in a pet shop where Alison is covered in spiders and snakes. Weird movie.
#horror #halloween #october #slasher #robot #80s #radio #podcast

 
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Better Watch Out

Making an effective slasher movie these days would be difficult. Making a Christmas themed slasher would be even harder. Better Watch Out from 2017 achieves both of these things and then some, making it one of my favourite horror movies in recent years.
It's Christmas and Ashley (Olivia DeJonge) is babysitting 12 year old Luke (Levi Miller), who has a major crush on her and decides he is making his move tonight. Throughout the night there are some pretty effective jump scares and shadows moving around the house, all of which turn out to be Luke's best friend Garrett (Ed Oxenbould - all three main actors in this movie are Australian). They think it's all going to settle down when BAM! a rock flies through the window saying 'You leave, you die'.
Then there is a twist. An awesome twist. A creative twist that I'm not going to spoil here (and hopefully others won't either).
The acting is solid, it is tense the whole way through and the ending is so f**king satisfying.
Who wins this movie: Levi Miller puts in a superb performance as Luke, just watch it and see what I mean.
Best kill: When ****** gets ****** then has ****** is awesome. Seriously I'm not spoiling it. Good Home Alone joke though.

 
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happy death day

So a lot of people, myself included, may have disregarded this movie because, let's face it, the title kind of sucks, the trailer didn't sell the idea that well and the killer's mask was a giant baby's head.
Turns out we don't know shit.
This movie is Groundhog Day with a dash of Final destination and a dollop of Scream.
Jessica Rothe plays Tree (yep!)a young woman who wakes up hungover in a boys dorm room and keeps reliving the same day over and over again. The catch? Each day she is murdered by a serial killer stalking her college campus. As she relives each day she discovers more clues as to who the killer is while also dealing with realties of being stuck in an infinite loop.
It is an imaginative concept played out exceptionally well by all the cast, especially the actors that Tree encounters each day when she walks through the quad.
I'm a sucker for movies that deal with the concept of time and there a few really good touches to the genre in Happy Death Day. The best example of this is when Tree discovers that all the injuries she has sustained when she is murdered are having an effect on her body when she wakes up again.
Definitely a spin on the sci-fi and slasher genres, check out Happy Death Day and enjoy!
Who Wins the Film: Jessica Rothe provides a balance of heroine, comic relief and the heart of this film flawlessly.
Best Kill: The montage where Tree is making her suspect list but also being killed over and over works so well.
#halloween #dvg #horror #horrormovie #october #slasher #time #happydeathday #movie #film #radio #podcasts #podcast #adelaide

 
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Train to Busan

Possibly one of the best zombie movies....ever!
There is SO many zombie movies to choose from these days and, unfortunately, not many are even in the same league as Train to Busan.
The zombies look great and are terrifying, the setting is tense and claustrophobic but this movie's biggest strengths is it's heart. I can't remember a horror movie where I genuinely cared about what happened to the main characters as much as this one. From the moment Seok-woo and his daughter Su-an board the soon to be doomed train, you are invested in their story.
An injured woman boards the train turns into a zombie the one by one the other passengers are either joining the undead or running for their lives. As the train pulls into major stations the passengers discover that the zombie outbreak has affected the whole country.
It is intense and genuinely scary right up to the heartbreaking ending. See this movie now.
Who wins this movie: Young actress Kim Su-an is amazing as the daughter Su-an.
Best kill: All the kills are bloody and brutal in this movie, my favorite scene is when the train pulls into a major station that is overrun with the undead. So good!
#horror #halloween #dvg #horrormovie #zombie #october #film #movie #netflix #podcast #radio #traintobusan #undead

 
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The House on Sorority Row

So, say the old woman who owns the sorority house you live in says you can't have a party. Then just suppose you accidentally kill her trying an elaborate (and kinda stupid) prank. What do you do?? If you are the girls in The House on Sorority Row you dump the body in a pool, go ahead with the party and find the most 80s band imaginable to play.
Mysteriously each of the girls involved in the prank start going missing and our final girl, Katherine (Kate McNeil), starts to wonder if the old lady is really dead.
She is though. Really dead. But luckily she has her mentally unstable son living in the attic just busting to avenge her death.
The who dunnit slashers of the 80s were some of the best of the genre and this is top shelf stuff. The acting is actually pretty good, story is solid and the kills are effective (even if the blood looks a little pink sometimes).
Who Wins the Movie: Kate McNeil is one of the best ever final girls, even if she did help cover up a murder.
Best kill: The first guy had nothing to do with anything, just needed to pee at the wrong place at the wrong time.

 
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dr who: the greatest show in the galaxy

Ok, i'm no Whovian. I am at best a casual acquaintance of the Doctor Who franchise but it's hard not to at least respect something that has stood the test of time like the Time Lord.
They used to show re-runs of old Doctor Who seasons when I was younger and the theme song actually used to scare me. One day after school I got through the song and was introduced to The Greatest Show in the Galaxy, a collection of four episodes from the late 80s starring the seventh doctor, Sylvester McCoy (I'm not sure if he is fan favorite or not, and also don't want to get into THAT fight).
Basically the Doctor and his companion, Ace, go to some weird planet to see a circus and find out that travellers are captured, imprisoned and forced to perform. The whole thing is run by Chief Clown, who to this day is still terrifying, and his robot clown minions. Add to the mix one of the the prisoners turning into a werewolf and you have what I still count as one of the most terrifying things I have seen in television.
Yes, watching it these days it has lost a bit of its punch but for after school viewing when I was 10, it had a profound effect.
Who wins the Show: The doctor's companion Ace (Soohie Aldred) is the star. She didn't even want to go to the circus because of her clown phobia, and man does she make that fear believable.
Best Kill: Whizz Kid, a big fan of the circus (and apparently based on real life Doctor Who fans) fails to entertain and pays dearly.
#horror #doctorwho #clowns #scary #october #television #bbc #radio #podcast #nostalgia

 

Slumber Party Massacre

Ok, stick with me here. Is Slumber Party Massacre a perfect film? No. But in the slasher genre it stands out as one of the classics. It's bloody, it's gratuitous and it's actually pretty funny too. The plot (!) is pretty simple. Parents go away, girls have party (party is planned while showering together in a locker room, obviously), killer stalks girls...rinse...repeat. By the way, the parents ask their creepy neighbour to 'keep an eye on the girls'....this neighbour we find out later walks around his garden at night killing snails with a meat cleaver!
Directed by Amy Jones, writer of The Relic (past DVG podcast ep) and also the writer of Beethoven (yep the Charles Grodin dog movie), manages to introduce some new spins on the genre such as the killer moving bodies around after he offs them and the clever use of foreshadowing (the horoscope scene creatively reveals the fate of two characters). Fun fact, she was given the choice of directing her own movie or editing E.T. (you gotta stand by your decisions).
The dialogue in this movie is somewhere between softcore porn and an after school special ('Hey, you played really good basketball out there'), but the kills more than make up for it. The soundtrack was made using a Casio keyboard and you can absolutely tell. A power drill is the primary weapon of the killer and, as well as an undeniably phallic symbol, it is used effectively.
It is most definitely not Shakespeare but if you like your slashers, this is definitely for you.
Who Wins the Movie:
Jackie (Andree Honore) while hiding from the killer, starts eating a pizza dropped by a recently murederd delivery guy while saying 'Life goes on'....this would be me in the same situation.
Best Kill: The killer is satisfyingly dispatched by three of the girls he has menaced during the night. The tip of his drill being chopped off by one of the girls just HAS to be metaphorical too.
#slasher #pizza #halloween #dvg #horror #horrormovie #october #80s #nostalgia #finalgirl

 
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The X-Files S04E02 Home

Listeners will know I'm a fairly huge fan of the exploits of Agents Mulder & Scully. The X-Files combined horror, sci fi, creature feature, crime, alternative history and also managed to be funny at times too. There are certain episodes that even these days still give me the creeps but out of all of them 'Home' from Season 4 stands above the rest.
The episode opens on a stormy night at a rural broken down farmhouse owned by the notorious Peacock family. A baby is born but is then carried out to the yard and buried alive. The body is discovered by some kids playing baseball and soon Mulder & Scully arrive to investigate. From there we have a terrifying slow burn home invasion murder (with an upbeat 50's song as it's inappropriate yet effective soundtrack) and an intense showdown back at the farmhouse (boobytraps!!) with the Peacock brothers (one of whom Gillian Anderson was dating in real life!). The chilling revelation learnt at the end of the episode caps off one of the most disturbing hours in TV history.
The episode got banned by Fox when it first aired and a MA rating from the classification board. It is also one the highest rated X-Files episodes.
The writers James Wong and Glenn Morgan (Final Destination baby!!!) apparently wanted to make the most f**cked up X-Files episode ever....congratulations gentlemen, you did it!
Who Wins the Episode: Karin Konoval puts in quite the performance....won't spoil anything else.
Best kill: Gung-ho Deputy Barney Paster (Sebastian Spence), avenging the Sheriff's death, literally loses his head storming the Peacock house.
#horror #halloween #dvg #xfiles #october #television #creepy #mulder #scully #radio #podcast #nostalgia

 
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The Descent

During my days working at the video store I was always asked for recommendations. After a while I would have my 'go to' list in each genre, and right at the top for horror was The Descent. It is is a brilliant horror/suspense/monster movie about a group of women who go spelunking in an isolated cave, unaware of the horrors that dwell within.
After the entrance of the cave collapses and traps them, they all search for a way out. As they search there is movement in the cave, drawing the viewers in and increasing the sense of unease. In one of the scariest scenes...I'm going to say ever...the lights flicker on and off and suddenly a hideous pale creature appears next to them. Then it gets crazy.
As the movie progresses the dynamics of the group are just as unrelenting as the creatures as they have to deal with double crossing, mercy kills and painful secrets coming to light as well as the bloodthirsty enemy.
The Descent is directed by Neil Marshall who also gave us the awesomely gruesome Dog Soldiers and the underrated (I think) new interpretation of Hellboy earlier this year. See this movie!!
Who Wins the Movie: Sarah is dealt one of the shittiest hands ever to a horror movie character and is outstandingly acted by Shauna Macdonald.
Best kill: The first kill is so unexpected and so visceral, it's hard to top.
#horror #halloween #dvg #descent #creature #australia #radio #podcast #nostalgia #october #film #movie #horrormovie